Fa la la la la... la la.. la... *sigh*... La...

Seeing as how absolutely no one follows my blog, my twitter, my xanga... etc. I do not begin to understand why I even keep these accounts active except for the people that I follow. However, that is not the point/topic of my post.

It is December and I have not posted in a few months. I feel the urge to write, even if it is not actual writing and something that no one will see.

As my previous post stated, I graduated June 12th 2010. For some reason I keep thinking that I graduated in July when in fact I did not. I took my boards on July 7th and failed. The day before my best friend's wedding (yes, I know... "ha ha its a movie [/sarcasm]") I was informed of my failure. I spent the majority of the rehearsal attempting to keep my tears safely hidden inside as well as appear to show my great happiness that my BF was now marrying her new eternal BFF and soul mate. ;-) I am and was truly happy for her, but was sidetracked by my depressing news. I retook my boards on August 28th. Now bare in mind that I did not study. I felt like I remembered most of what I learned in the Hurst review and so I felt WAY over confident. Not to mention the fact that my boss interpreted the term "graduation" as "you can now work 40 + hours." From July 7th to August 28th, I again was consumed with work, fell ill a couple of times, and was exhausted almost 24/7. Still, even in my down time my study was minimal. Yes, I studied 50X harder than before but that is not hard considering I didn't study at all the first time. So, 2 days after my 2nd attempt I was again informed of my failure. BOTH times that I failed, I barely failed. This to me is worse than completely bombing it. Had I bombed it, I might have been more motivated to study. Barely failing told me that I had the knowledge, I just needed the smallest amount more. Attempt 3 I was successful. I actually studied for attempt 3. Mind you, I did not study hard, but I did take a few practice tests and read through a few review books. I passed by a landslide. I am kicking myself because if I would've just applied myself from the start I would've saved myself a LOT of money and heartache. I am now a registered nurse and I am currently looking for a job. Absolutely NO ONE right now is hiring. It is very difficult to find a nursing job.

We are living in my in-laws house that they are trying to sell. Its nice because I don't have to pay rent but its a huge step of faith because we could be homeless at any moment.

My husband and I have decided to leave the fate of pregnancy in the Lord's hands. I will be 24 this coming year and due to certain health concerns I've been informed that when I hit 35, if I have not had my first child by that age, then I will have to adopt or face possible adverse effects. Seeing as how we want a mid-sized/larger family, I feel we are losing time. I am not 100% sure I am ready for children right now, this is yet another reason that I am leaving this to God. We've decided to go "natural" and I have stopped taking birth control. We are not actively "trying" for children, but simply praying that everything will happen in His perfect timing. We know that as long as we have faith He will provide for us and our offspring.

I may not have a job now but I know that He will provide me with one eventually.

Christmas was wonderful. I had a great time with family and received many wonderful gifts from my in-laws.

It's time for bed however. I am exhausted from work today at the dreadful BK dungeon.

*adieu*

Is fuath liom mo phost, Life ró-ghnóthach anois. de dhíth orm vacation.

Update:

Graduated on June 12th.
Took and failed boards on July 7th.
Natalie's wedding July 10th, lbs lost- 0

Right now I have the pleasure of taking boards again on August 28th.

I seriously hate my job at Burger King.

My feet are absolutely killing me.

I need a nap.

That about sums up my life at the moment.

Graduated.... now to take my boards...

C'est La Vie

I was supposed to work today. However so many different things happened so that I find myself here at home. My goal is to catch up on things around the house that I've been neglecting due to my super busy schedule. I've been so exhausted that I just have no energy for anything. All I want to do is sleep. I don't mind working at the hospital but I am getting tired of preceptorship. I am tired of school. I graduate in around a week and I am so ready to be done!

*sigh* I guess that I have to just bear with it.

G'night all.

Insert creative title

Today is day 6.

27 days til graduation

55 days til Nat's wedding.

6 weeks and I graduate....

HOLY FREAKING COW MAN!

House

So I have been trying to catch up on House lately. It's been pretty interesting. I definitely enjoy this show.

Also, I am super close to graduating and it scares me to death!

Not much else going on. Just a ton of Stress! I am about ready to explode.

In other news... yeah I have nothing.

Back to House.

Ciao

For the love of things that no man hath seen is great, when he hath acquired those things their greatness no longer shines.

Today was the second day of the LAST quarter I will spend as a nursing student. My journey through this major has been long and extremely stressful. I am excited to be finishing my degree but at the same time I am scared to finally be going out into the real work force. I mean, yes, I have been working as a fast food manager for the last almost six years. I don't really see that as a career. That was mainly just a stint that helped pay the bills so that I could remain in school. I am comfortable at that job because I know what I am doing but I do not want to be there.

Outside of school life has still had its ups and downs. On March 21st 2010, my great grandfather died. He was a good man and I will miss him so much! I am happy though at the same time because he is in a much better place right now.

I still have a lot of drama with my friends. I consider a couple of my friends to be true friends but there is one that to me is more superficial, and I wish it were not that way. Game night has come to an end due to this.

I have started working out at the YMCA and I have been faithfully going 3x a week for I think almost 3 weeks. So not very long, but it is a start.

Well, I must be off to work and then on to writing my resume, doing reading for school and then either updating my website or cleaning the house.

~Fin~

Oh that this too too solid flesh would melt

Drama. That seems to be my life lately and to be honest, the drama in my life is caused over and over by the same people and it does not matter what I do, they create drama for me. If I try to leave them alone and disassociate myself with them they create drama about it, and if I tey to just lie low and slip under the radar then they find these outrageous reasons to pick at me and create more drama.

School sucks worse than ever. At first I was afraid of my senior year. Now I just want to be down with this whole mess.

Ciao.

Ante-Valentines Day

Goals:

But Jamson's valentine gift BEFORE Feb. 14th.

Pass the two exams I have Friday.

Pass the exam I have Tomorrow.

Survive until Graduation.

Not too much to ask, right?

This Sunday is Valentines Day. I do not have my husband's gift yet. Also, we will be having game night. We have since had another game night and it was a lot of fun. Who knew that a game of Taboo could be so much fun.

Oh and when you have a room full of skilled Uno players... the game lasts for an eternity!

EDIT: Passed both exams, though I got a C on one of them and I'm pretty sure I passed the 3rd. Bought Jameson's gift. I got him "Brutal Legend." He got me a turning stand for my cakes, a red rose, and a giant candy bar. (My favorite, Herhey's Cookies and Creme) Now I just have to survive until graduation, and actually make it to graduation. That will be the key.

Community

So, This must be brief as I must study for my Community Nursing exam.

Game Night has become interesting. We've had one, yet everyone wants to continue them. Problem is, when. More to come on that topic.

I've been up and down lately as far as my mood is concerned.

Jameson and I had out pictures done. Out of 100 or so we were given around 40, and out of those 40 I found maybe 3 that I liked. *sigh*

The two you see are examples of those.
In other news today starts my new goal. First: I will try to go to the Y at least once a week. (I like to take baby steps.) Then I will progress from there as I have time. That is my issue at the moment. I never have time to go.

Thats about it for now.

GAME NIGHT

My friends and I have decided to start a game night. It took one of us having a birthday party for us to figure out that we all like playing games. So, needless to say, Friday night was our first "game night" with many more to follow I am sure. We had a lot of fun, I had class that day so I was up at 6am and then game night didn't end until around 1am... Staying up until 1 am normally would not be an issue if it weren't for the fact that I had to wake up at 5am the next morning. Still, that wasn't so bad. I went to work, came home, had a dinner party with the parents and in-laws... they left around 8ish or 9. Jameson and I went to bed and slept until 10am today because of the tiring weekend. Now, however, we have to get back to the real world.

MONOPOLY

So, Jameson and I have been playing Monopoly Deal like crazy. Guess that's what happens when you have nothing to do and no money to do it.

Class today went well. I had my first test today and got an 83%. Not terrible. Work tonight.

That's about it.

Ciao.

"It's a Tooosday, and We're not open on a Tooosday."

Right, so today is my first clinical for my Community Nursing course. I arrived at the school I will be working for (for the next 3 weeks) only to be sent back home. They are on a 2 hour delay.

*sigh*

More to come when I get home tonight.

So, clinical went well, work went ok... Tomorrow I have class and work so, not much going on.

Mi Vida es Loca y Muy Insana

Rant: I woke up early because I had to wor in Bellville at a different store today. So I get there at 10 til 8 and they have no clue that I am supposed to be there. Great, just friggin great. So JJ calls Jo to ask if she is actually coming in or if she has the day off. No answer. So she calls Tony. He says I am supposed to be there but calls Matt to find out. Again, no answer. So I sit around for 30 minutes unti Jo calls back ans says that, yes, she is coming in. So I have to go back to my store to work. My hours this week went from 31 (and a $200 check) to 25 (and a much less than $200 check) And rent is due... as well as 4 other bills...

So I went to a birthday party tonight. I didn't really want to go at first. I am kind of a home body and I don't really like to go out unless I go out in the early afternoon and just stay out. After about 7 or 8 pm I pretty much want to stay home, like I said, unless I am just already out. I had some fun but to be honest, I am inda tired of always being brought down. I mean, here is blunt honesty and then there is just being mean. I understand that sometimes I bring it upon myself but I hate that I am always being put down. Still it was nice to get out of the house and have some semblance of a good time.

School is going... well, its going. I've already turned in two papers. I have a timeline due Thursday as well as a test and I have an ATI and a test on Friday. Somewhere I have to start fitting in time to work out.

Well, I guess I'd better attempt to get some sleep.

Goodnight Cyberspace- think of me and wish me luck.

-Fin-

Le Sigh.

Act I Scene II

My pillow felt so comfortable under my head that I new I must be awake. I looked at my phone and read 0023. I closed my eyes and wandered back into the realms of fantasy and occasionally fear. Now, repeat scene. I for some reason continuously woke up last night. Finally at 0400 I decided I would stop attempting to fall asleep again and stayed there until 0430 when I actually had to get up. The shower was glorious this morning! I love hot water! So much for the good part of my day.

Act II Scene I

Work. Pergatory. Servitude. This was a long day. Over all it was not even remotely as bad as other days that I have had but still. My first break was at 0700 and that was just way too early. We were so slow that it was boring. Everything was caught up and so it was hard to stay busy yet still work. The only projects that could keep you busy were the kind that required hands on-elbow grease yet you still had to be 100% into running your position. Second break at 1100. My wonderful husband came and ate with me. Then later my parents showed up. That was a nice surprise. After lunch we had a bus and 4 church vans... Now dont get me wrong, I appreciate customers and feel that they are essential in my acquiring a paycheck but when they trash the dining room I get angry. There is no reason to be a slob just because you are eating at a fast food joint.

Act III Soliloquy
[darkened stage, spotlight, gentle music] ent. Star

Why? Why do you treat the cashiers as if they are uneducated. Do you not know that this job pays my way through college. Did you go to college? Why do you treat us as if we will only screw up your order, and you come in expecting failure? Do you not realize that I will ring your order exactly as you say? Why do you yell at me when you were the one who forgot to order a part of your meal?

Parents, if your child does not know what they want before you pull into the lane, please order for them. Why must I reap the wrath of my boss for your inconsideration? Why must I be responsible for the fact that you were in our lane for over five minutes when you spent four and a half of them arguing with those in the car? Why must you yell at me if I miss something off your order because your screaming children were drowning you out and I couldn't hear you?

Please stop yelling at me when I ask you if you want cheese on that, fries and a drink, or if you would like to upsize your meal. Did you not know that these are the requirements of my job and that I must ask them lest I fall into trouble? Do you understand just how much I am yelled at thoughout the day? Do you realize just how much I am responsible for?

Please no not get upset when I charge you for sauces. They cost us 10 cents, so that is what I charge you. We are not making money on them, we are not ripping you off, we are just trying not to lose money.

Please, think of me. Think of the person serving you as a person. I am a human being with feelings and am doing my job the way I am supposed to do my job. If you cannot handle they way my job is done then I suggest you spend a day in my shoes.

Act IV

So I spent a good bit of time on the phone today. I am just plain exhausted. I am writing this as I am watching my husband play a game. I think I shall end this and return to realm that I so long to make reality for some of my dreams are quite nice.

-Fin-

Getting Started

I am not a "blogger" by nature but I do like to talk. So, in venturing away from xanga I have decided to officially "blog." This will mostly be my thoughts as they come to me, a journal of sorts. Seeing as how I do not expect anyone to read this I plan on saying whatever I want to.

Today is miserable. There I said it. The snow outside, while beautiful, makes me scared out of my wits to drive. I have class all day today and of course the school would make one class on campus and the other in Ontario at the annex... My school irritates me sometimes. Speaking of which, I found out yesterday that I have to be fingerprinted to take the NCLEX. I don't mind that they want to fingerprint me but it would've been nice for someone to tell me that I had to sign up. We have to have it done on the 18th of this month. There was no email notice, nothing. So how was I supposed to find out? The girl with me had no clue either. I get frustrated sometimes at how often it seems that I have no clue what is going on until I find someone who blurts it out to me and then has to fill me in.

Today is day 3 of winter quarter. Classes seem like they will be interesting to some degree. Work at the BK still sucks. I've narrowed it down to why. However, that is one thing I won't put in any form of writing.

-Fin-